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April 07, 2007


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Well, I suppose we can rest assured in the knowledge that Oprah has the #3 award locked down for next year.

Unless something even dumber than the Secret hits this year. Oh, the hurting.

Concerning Bob Park's comments on the Templeton Foundation, I believe the internationally recognized unit of prayer is the "pastor", which is defined as the power output of one local pastor or priest for one minute.

As to relative power, the output varies in direct proportion to the holiness of the pray-er. Pat Robertson has been known to show a peak output as high as nine kilopastors, while the Vatican consistently registers in the low megapastor range. This can be confirmed with a hand-held pastorimeter, though more accurate results can be achieved using computer-aided pastorimetry.

Oh, let's give the Secretard award directly to Joe Vitale next year. Oprah's got enough attention. She could have the Exploitometer Award, though.

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